How on earth did I miss a headline like this?
It seems that there is a shortage of sperm donors and one enterprising Monash IFV clinic has come up with a solution for the drought:
As the AFL season starts this weekend, fertility clinic Monash IVF will write to the 10 Victorian-based AFL clubs, asking their players to become sperm donors.
And let's face it, if you want sperm, who else are you going to call? The Melbourne IVF clinic has another group in its sights:
Another clinic, Melbourne IVF, is lifting a 20-year ban on gay men becoming sperm donors. It has not permitted gay men to be donors since HIV became a problem in the 1980s. But gay men have been allowed to donate sperm for friends.
It shows great progress that gay men and footballers are being asked to help out, but the real progress in this story is the reason the additional sperm will be needed:
The two clinics are on a recruiting drive in anticipation of changes to state laws that will put their sperm supplies under even more pressure.
The Victorian Law Reform Commission has spent more than four years reviewing the state's fertility legislation. Yesterday, it handed its final report to Attorney-General Rob Hulls. A key recommendation is likely to be that single women and lesbians be permitted access to donor insemination and IVF, regardless of whether or not they are clinically infertile.
I'm thrilled at the possibilities this open up for women who want a baby regardless of their relationship status and sexual orientation. I managed to hold it together most of the way through the article, but I was quite undone when I got to this:
Melbourne IVF donor counselling co-ordinator Kate Bourne said while she supported the changes, the "floodgates" would open. She urged men to think about coming forward. "Donors aren't wankers," she said. "The donors I've had contact with have been genuinely nice men."
First they sock us with the "floodgates" opening image and then they jab us with the "Donors aren't wankers" thing - a statement that in the best of cases would be both true and untrue.
But let's focus on the kinds of genes that AFL footballers bring to the table:
If you are going to watch football of any kind, I think Australian Rules Football is a damned strong contender.